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Saying What You Mean

“Life is too short to be little. Man is never so manly as when he feels deeply, acts boldly, and expresses himself with frankness and with fervor.”
~Benjamin Disraeli~

Methinks life is too short to walk through it tiptoeing.  There are people and events which must be endured, but most of what we do is by raw choice only.  Job is bad?  Change it.  Mate is bad?  Change or leave it.  Too fat?  Take one less bite of the cake.

But by all means stop blaming the world for your ills, unless you are trapped in dire poverty not of your own making with goose stepping soldiers outside your door.

Otherwise, speak up to those who wish to control you.  If you know what you stand for, you will stop falling.  Your voice and actions will be aligned with your absolute best interests.  And your best interests are for the best.

Speak with conviction and truth.

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Commencement

“Graduation is only a concept.  In real life every day you graduate.  Graduation is a process that goes on  until the last day of your life.  If you can grasp that, you’ll make a difference. ”     ~Arie Pencovici~

How can we stop the past from effecting the present and the future? That’s not an easy question to answer.

If you have gone through separation or divorce, perhaps you have gone through a difficult period where you always judge a potential new partner against the old one, despite the unhappiness that that previous mate may have brought to you.

If you are a marketer who keeps going to the same market with the same offer and getting meager results, what holds you back from trying a new approach?

Life patterns, if well developed, are  great navigating tools to help you separate the wheat from the chaff. They allow us to measure progress and determine according to a set of concrete criteria whether doing something or being with someone is beneficial to our growth.

Some of you may think that our moral obligations must be chained to us forever. Such mindset encourages us to feel guilty and to suffer at the expense of our personal growth.

You hear such people say things as “I’d love to take that new job but I can’t leave my husband to fend for himself. He can’t even fry an egg.”; “My kids steal all my time, so I have none for myself”; “If I left the firm, it would go to seed.”

Let’s rephrase these mental mind traps:

“It’s time for my husband to graduate to self-sufficiency. My personal growth is not subject to his”

“I love my kids dearly, but love must be a two-way street. I am a multidimensional being whose pleasure and accomplishments are(at times) independent of them”

“Firms will come and go, as will I. It’s time to move on to new challenges. I’ll find my replacement this week.”

This article’s title is “Commencement,” which is often misunderstood as graduation. Commencement means “To begin,” not to finish.

Have you stopped questioning your status and condition in the scheme of things? Are you commencing with your life every day? Are you victimized by the random ebbs and flows of life? Are you not never endingly educating yourself to be a bigger and more successful you? Are you relegating your fate to the whims and fantasies of others?

Then please get a grip. Dedicate yourself to education and action. Truly, the best is yet in front of you once you take the reigns. Let’s commence.

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Are The Best Things In Life Free?

A few years ago I had the pleasure of visiting the Philippines on business.  What struck me most was the huge divide between the rich and the poor and the generosity and kindness of the latter.

In Davao, the gateway to the southern part of the island-nation, my business brought me to a rural area.  In the comfort of an air-conditioned office of a relatively rich businessman, I ate lunch and then talked shop.  Afterwards, I asked my host to take me on a short walk to meet and mingle with the locals.

There were no pretensions, no fancy cars, no cellular phones, no anything other than the bare minimums of a Twenty-First Century life with a roof over your head.  Yet I was intrigued by the simple and basic style of life these natives led.

Then we ran into a group of small. giggling elementary school children playing on a dirt road.  They had a broken bottle, some bottle caps and a host of other “trashy things” that most westerners, especially Japanese, would feel embarrassed to touch or play with.  It seemed that they were involved in a sort of sand-hockey game, but the nature of the game is not really the point of this story.

The point being that you needn’t have a fancy car, a 17-carat diamond ring and a summer home in Monterrey to have happiness.  All these things are the gravy and cream only if you are happy in your skin to begin with.

What’s interesting is that the poorest people in the world – including the Australian Aborigines – have the lowest incidence of suicide.  It could be said that they have something to live for – the dream of having an education, a car, a trip to Europe or whatever – but there seems to be more to this phenomenon than meets the eye.

We of the comparatively rich countries on this planet have many of the amenities of the “good life” covered plus alpha, and yet many of us have this gnawing sensation that something is missing in our lives.

And that chasm between our desire for happiness and finding happiness grows with each distracting toy and throwaway of affluence we buy for our immediate gratification and to impress others.

I’m not advocating the good old days were really all that much better than those we now live through.  What I am saying is that a broken bottle and a bottle cap seem to bring more intrinsic value than an X-box, a Gucci bag or a trip to Spain do for the more well off of our brethren.

Smell the roses.  See the sky.  Get fascinated with the eyes of your mate or child. They and an infinite number of objects and experiences are there for the offing.

I challenge you to keep your billfold in your back pocket for a few days and discover the cathartic essence of being free.

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Look Beyond Your Nose

“Appreciating each other is a true family value, one that will bail out much of the stress on the planet and help strengthen the universal bond all people have.”     ~Sara Paddison, Hidden Power of the Heart~

One of my favorite thinkers and writers is a man named Robert Ringer.  In a recent article he was analyzing why mass killers snap and what, if anything, we can do about it before a tragedy strikes.

I agree with Robert that there are some things we can do to avoid having a killer mow down innocents in a mall or a school classroom.

The Million-Dollar Habit we all need to nurture is to say “Hi” with a smile.  This is not be the robotic social convention “Hi,” but one where we try to brighten another’s day.  Taking very depressed people up even a notch can make all the difference between them acting out aggressively and violently or seeking counseling and cathartic prayer.

Horrific massacres do not come out of the blue.  They usually stem from years of alienation and isolation.  Granted, some of it is self-imposed by the psychopath, but part of it comes from their fear of rejection to the umpteenth degree.  Because of their locked-in bad attitude, inevitably they harbor a self-fulfilling philosophy which often leaves them in long cycles of misery, depression and paranoia.

So between your dashes to that next business meeting or soccer practice for the kids, take a moment and reach out to those who may be troubled…and that could include each of us at times!

That little tweak in your daily pattern could save a life or thirty.  Use your two eyes to see beyond your nose.  Someone somewhere desperately needs your smile.

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Set A Money-Generating Goal

“Let your hook always be cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be a fish.”  ~Ovid~

Let’s face it, being an entrepreneur is not for everybody.  It takes hard work, discipline and perseverance to the extreme.

One of the easiest ways to fail is to just drift from week to week with only a vague sense of what you want to accomplish and where you want to go with your life.

If you flew an airplane like you probably lead your life, then you would most likely crash in a remote jungle village.  So set the compass of your life this week.

Decide that you are going to create a certain amount of extra money – let’s say $50, for argument’s sake – and then test the plan all week without giving up on your target.

At the very least, you may develop a long-term strategy for success based on your effort.  In the best-case scenario, you will not only earn $50 or more, but you will also have a boost of confidence which can sustain you.

Five years from now those modest monetary goals may be laughingly minuscule.  Give this method a chance and write to me about your successes.

You can get better and better at all endeavors with consistency and persistence.

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We Have A Right To Be Rich

“Virtue does not come from wealth, but. . . wealth, and every other good thing which men have comes from virtue.”       ~Socrates~　

Yes, we do have the right!  Not simply to acquire money for money’s sake, but to fully express our God-given uniqueness and full potential. 　

I guarantee you – and I speak from the school of experience – that if you lack money, then you have a crappy attitude towards it. 　

Perhaps that attitude stems from your religious upbringing.  Or perhaps it is derived from having been born into poverty and having hung around with impoverished people living in squalor and feeling that it is God’s will that we should all suffer until Heaven. 　

Perhaps, perhaps…but I feel that most people who would read the headline above and want to read on are suffering from lack-itis.  Anyone with me thus far has more money and opportunity than 95 percent of the world’s inhabitants.　

Lack of confidence, for starters, leaves us in the starting gate or  peeking in the upscale toy store at Christmas.  You get what you deserve.

Lack of developed imagination, to dig deeper, leaves us feeling incapable of finding a niche or something we can excel at and be paid to do. We slave on and complain until Kingdom comes.　

No game plan, for the main course, leaves us adrift and chasing one scamming opportunity after another.  This leads to cynicism on a large scale.　

Lack of a vision that you can be rich and deserve to be in that picture leaves us bitterly bankrupt of thoughts and cash.　

The thread in this message is that if everything (or most things) in your life come from a poverty mindset, then expect the worst.  Not even a huge lottery jackpot can save you from yourself.　

Yes, lack kills dreams and leads to surrender before the phantom enemy ever attacks.　

So why not think huge?  Entertain yourself as being royalty.  Treat others as if you are already rich.  In other words, be generous, forgiving and engaging with every soul you come in contact with.  Everyone is on your team, so trust before you shut the door to possibility.　

You have a right and a duty to have the most and give the most.  That thinking style cannot but help lead to unimaginable riches which can’t be measured in coin.

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I’ll Do It When…

“You must get good at one of two things. Planting in the spring or begging in the fall.”      ~Jim Rohn~

Good ideas come a dime a dozen.  Many altruistic people in forums have cushy, cathartic-feeling ideas of how to turn the world on its head.   Yet frankly most of these soap boxers are frustrated, struggling poor folks with time on their hands and a trusty computer as their only real companion.

How sad that they have little money, and no way to express themselves other than by bitching about abuses of  power and ruminating over how other politicians and entrepreneurs of their political leaning – if given the reigns – would make the world into Heaven.

I say utter nonsense to that notion.  Power isn’t out there.  It rests within the fella or gal you look at in the mirror each day.  We are dynamos when we get off our rumps.

The Internet is absolutely an essential – though not exclusive tool in reaching people for your business or project.  Unless, however,  you are a leader who walks the talk, rest assured that nobody other than complacent, lazy, get-rich-quick, do-nothingers will flock to your side and then pull you down..

And believe me – because I have been on both sides of this coin – the do-nothinger will breed contempt and scorn those who do lead, accomplish and have momentum. They will wrestle you to the ground and dope you into a stupor of hopelessness.

The interesting point is that if the lazy person does something other than complain and wait for miracles – that is, take massive, no-holds-barred action to make a go at life – movers and shakers who are able change the locked-in paradigms of unfairness will begin to listen and respond to your demands for justice and fairness..

The people in power are not computer philosophers or romanticists – they get things done.  Whether or not we like what they do is totally a waste of breath or brain energy.

The message the successful, sometimes greedy people convey is that I am motivated, directed, and thus momentum is usually on my side.  The real test of character is to take those in power to task and become the best we can possibly be – with no excuses allowed!

Everyone wants to believe they are sincere, honest and giving.  The problem is we look at those values as intellectual exercises where intent counts; I believe only action and results count.  Everything else is drivel before our fellow humans and our Maker.

I challenge myself and each of you to take massive action.    Become like the Vikings who took their family and all their possessions with them into battle.  There was no turning back.  Were they successful?  Absolutely!

Follow the wise words of my favorite mentor the next time you want to surrender and complain:

“If you spend five minutes complaining, you have wasted five minutes.  If you continue complaining, it won’t be long before they haul you out to a financial desert and there let you choke on the dust of your own regret.”

Come into this year with a new lease on life.  Become excellent.  Get help whenever and wherever you can.  Stand tall.

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Standing Over Your Gravestone

(Your First Name) was a loving man/woman of many talents.

He/she smiled when others frowned.

He/she listened when others would jump to judgment.

He/she took each day with a deadly seriousness, yet lived each one with the enthusiasm and vigor of a toddler in a room of toys.

He/she endured many tragedies and setbacks with a dignity and determination to move forward when the sea was once again calm enough.

He/she started with no money and only big dreams and parlayed his/her strengths into a small fortune.

He/she did not stop there.  He/she took a large chunk of that money and set up (a school for war orphans) and (a fund to inoculate the poorest of the poor from deadly water-born diseases). (Fill in with your ideas).

To his/her family, he/she was a treasure.  He/she set aside time in each busy work week to spend quality moments with those closest and dearest to him/her.

Most importantly, he/she cherished life.  He/she climbed majestic peaks, visited the Seven Wonders of the World, and dined by candlelight on the Riviera.

Ah, yes, he or she was a person who has left a legacy much greater than any who had known him/her in childhood or youth would have ever envisioned.

Hats off to him/her.  We will all miss (Your First Name) and cherish his/her warm eyes, engaging smile, and carefree attitude.

The best part is that he/she is still here and able to write this eulogy in the flesh.

Challenge yourself to live the eulogy you hope is written about you.  I will do so in my remaining years and so can you, however old or young you may be or feel.

Get to work and paint in the colors of your dreams.

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Putting Yourself in the Picture

“We need men who can dream things that never were.”     ~John F. Kennedy, 36th President of the USA~

Several years ago I heard a motivational talk in which the speaker said, “If you believe it, you can see it.”  This counter-intuitive pronouncement left me baffled and unsure how to apply the cryptic message.

Believe it or not, the mental pictures you have about yourself have painted your past, are shaping your present, and will determine your future.  Your mind follows you wherever you choose to take it.

In one book I recently read I came across a quote by Abraham Lincoln which sums up what was said in the previous paragraph:  “To believe in the things you can see and touch is no belief at all; but to believe in the unseen is a triumph and a blessing.”

Wishy-washy images of being rich and happy do not register well with the subconscious mind.  You must see yourself in that red Jaguar cruising down that lonesome highway every day.  Or feel the graduation robes fluttering in the breeze as you are handed your hard-earned MBA diploma from Harvard on a summer day.

Commonly, people dream of the good life,yet haven’t the foggiest notion of what that means to them and what that entails them to do.  They follow trends and listen to everyone else’s unfounded rumors of what constitutes the good life and how to attain it.

Get a good education.  Marry up.  Get into a growing tech company.  Follow Robert Kiyosaki or Anthony Robbins.

The ticket to paradise is to sacrifice yourself for others or the common good.  Take just what you can.  Live for peace.  Die for your country.  Join the war against poverty, nuclear proliferation, global warming, AIDS, gay marriages, executive perks, abortion, child slavery, prostitution, drugs, government corruption, teen pregnancy, high fuel prices, robber barons, filth in the media…ad nauseum.

Advice by others is cheap.  The trouble is that one size never fits all in designing a life.  Nobody but you has to live with your decisions.  That’s right – your spouse or you can walk at any time on a whim!

We are each given a unique, divine mission in life – like it or not – and each of one of us can paint any picture we want of how to live and serve.  Not even our families, bosses or financial circumstances can rob us of our free will to dream huge and design a life of our own making.

I happen to be in Japan.  Many, including myself, have complained from time to time about this or that aspect of Japanese life.  But the absolute truth is that this country has every advantage you could ever wish for.  You can be or become whoever you want to be here.

It all begins when we paint an exquisite picture of who we are becoming and then live as if we have already arrived.

Visit your destiny each day until you feel right at home.　

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Doing What Is Right

It’s easy to act righteously when life is good and you have control over your destiny.

It is difficult to act wisely and generously when you are short of money, time or patience.

Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need.
–Kahlil Gibran–

The tricks this week are first to keep your cool when you usually lose it.  And secondly, to do what is right even when nobody is looking or when it is emotionally painful to do so.　

Life is the habits we form.  Little acts of kindness, compassion, generosity and forgiveness can go a long way towards making our lives more pleasurable. 　

Stand tall and stand for something worthwhile.  Respect will come your way.