Discarding Political Correctness

“Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes.”     ~Maggie Kuhn~

Being a great listener is certainly an essential element of all fully-integrated adults.  You have been given two ears and one mouth, it has been said, so that you will listen twice as much as speak.  A virtuous idea indeed! which should be consistently in your mind during every waking hour.

But…you must stand for something and be willing to defend your values in order to give true meaning to your life.  Be respectful to others while being true to yourself.

This is a tough balancing act.  And when we speak our minds full force, there is a new tripwire to deal with called political correctness.   Every word we say – the anal retentive claim – should be measured by whether it has, does or could offend some group of people.

That may sound Utopian, but in fact it is a dictum of fascism.  Language is spicy, dicey or offensive according to which group you are speaking to.  Language is our inexact attempt to express clearly and understandably to others how we feel about issues and people and to explain things with clarity.

Wouldn’t you rather hear racial slurs from a racist?  Or would you rather hear something like this:  “Some of my best friends ARE Jews (Negroes, Arab, etc.)?”  Just hearing that often makes me believe that the man or woman is a closet racist with a dollop of whip cream covering the truth.

“Oh darn” is really “Oh dammit” dressed in a bonnet.  You fool nobody by saying the former because the latter is what you wish to say.  So say it, and let the chips fall where they may.

Wars and other human relation difficulties are caused by obfuscating our real mind and real intentions. When a person’s trust has been called into question, then every utterance which follows this judgment will also be doubted as a lie or a manipulation.  This same principle can be extended to relations between nations.

So spice your language when it reflects your true sentiments.  Some arching, self-proclaimed pious folks may raise their collective eyebrows, but at least they know where you stand. That’s a big plus in a world of smoke-and-mirrors.

Life In The Past Lane

A line in a song says it precisely,

These are the good ole days.

Whatever you are doing and feeling at the present moment is a result of the actions or inactions, thoughtfulness or thoughtlessness of that water under the bridge of your life.

You can bring up what happened in a nostalgic moment – the people you met and the things you did – but not one moment of history and be changed or removed by recalling it.

The good ole days belong in the trash heap.

We all have demons, regardless of whether we want to admit it or not.

The door to the past is a strange door.  It swings open and things pass through it, but they pass in one direction only.” ~From Loren Eiseley’s The Immense Journey~

It is not a matter of whether mamma liked your brother best.  It is not a matter of who got what for whatever reason or who didn’t get their fair share.

It is a matter of learning how to deal with the lessons of life in a constructive manner and stop desperately clinging to the should, could and would haves that can haunt us.

Present moment living is always where the action is.  If your present moment is clouded or distorted by fear, rage, regret, disorientation or total apathy – then consider yourself to be living in the past and strangled by the future.

The time to come to grips is now.  Take action.  Talk to the customer.  Meet the prospect.  Get that webpage designed and operating.  Search out true-north alternatives to the life you secretly loathe yet inexplicably claim.

Make today’s decisions with an understanding that the flower never blooms until the seed is planted and watered.  There is a time lag between bold, positive, present-moment living and happiness at the end of the road.

Resolve in your mind to sacrifice immediate gratification for long-term empowerment.

Change lanes while you can.

Sorting Out the Clutter

In recent months I have become overwhelmed by information and clutter.  Learning is an addiction to me and it is my passion to read and absorb as much as I can about anything and everything and pass it forward.

This passion has moved to the edge of an obsession, and thus a moment of reckoning has been thrust upon me.  In writing this article, you are invited into my world and my thinking process.

How much of what you read, think and do is essential or even relevant to your success?

Are you on target in your life?  Or are you the target for other people’s wishes, whims and objectives because of your lack of focus?

What is making you wake up in the morning, splash your face with water, shovel down an empty breakfast and dash for the office or wherever?

Most importantly, what is slowing you down?  If you honestly evaluate which obstacles are standing in your path to success – however you may define success – then you will notice that most barriers are honestly of your own making and doing.

For example, I am subscribed to more than 100 marketing websites which generate mailings totaling close to 2000 per week!  No matter how fast I rev my mental engines, I can’t keep up with this maddening info tidal wave.

What insanities, what obsessions, what obstacles are holding you back from greatness?

Put them in a mental, virtual or physical file, lock the drawer, and throw away the key.  I have recently put most of those newsletters et al in an obscure Hotmail account which is troublesome (though not impossible) to access regularly.

Yes, my addiction to information is not cured, but for once in my life I am dealing with it.  I can finally hear and feel my true mind and spirit talking to me again.  I am (and you are) a storehouse of wisdom and value without the clutter.

Doing is dependent upon keeping your life simple and focused much more than in becoming a walking encyclopedia.

Of course, disregard this insight when reading this insightful newsletter.  It is full of ideas which you can put into action rather than to ruminate over.

Goal-Setting

 

 

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Goal setting as a process is simple, not easy. The reason most people fail at their goals is because they have never taken time to qualify their goals.

If you have not qualified your goals, when will meets imagination you can put your money on imagination. Qualification of your goals requires you to make a commitment to the goal before you can set it and achieve it. This becomes a gray area for most people. You cannot go and set a goal and hope that it will come to pass if you have not built the foundation for the
eventual goal to stand on.

The following steps will help you qualify your goals:
1. Identify everything you want to be, do and have.
2. After four hours ask yourself why.
3. Then ask yourself if you have this goal in balance.
4. Ask yourself the following five questions
a) Is it really your goal?
b) Can you commit yourself to reaching this goal?
c) Is it morally right and fair to all involved?
d) Is it consistent with your other goals?
e) Can you see yourself reaching this goal?

You must get a yes to all these questions before you can move forward in the goal setting process.
5. Now ask yourself if this goal will make you happier, healthier, more secure, give you peace of mind, good family relationships, prosperity and hope. Here you must get a yes to at least one of the criteria.

Congratulations!  You have qualified your goal for ongoing success.

 

 

Success Poem

To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty, to find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.
~Often attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson, it is an adaptation of a poem published in 1905 by Bessie Stanley.~
The poem above is a pretty solid foundation for building a legacy. No lasting success can ever be achieved in an unbalanced, unprincipled life dictated by blind greed and immediate gratification.

 

It Couldn’t Be Done

 

 

Somebody said that it couldn’t be done,
But he with a chuckle replied
That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried he hid it.
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;
At least no one ever has done it”;
But he took off his coat and he took off his hat,
And the first thing we knew he’d begun it.
With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing as he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure;
There are thousands to point out to you, one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,
Just take off your coat and go to it;
Just start to sing as you tackle the thing
That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it.

~By Edgar A. Guest~

We All Have The Same 24 Hours

We are as big or as small as our most prevalent thoughts.

If we believe in the adage that “Only the strong survive” yet we sense in ourselves a gnawing weakness or flaw of character, then we become the deer in the headlights.  Under such dismal circumstances, when opportunity knocks, we triple-bolt lock the door to our heart for fear of failure.

If, on the other hand, we embrace life as a chance to solve problems and resolve conflicts, then the reservoir of life’s forces are close at hand with reasonable, practical  solutions to our challenges.  The victim mentality will rapidly recede, and in its stead will be honesty, passion and true north actions which are based on who we are rather than who others think we should be.

With only perhaps 16 to 18 hours of waking time each day, the philosophy of life we embrace is of the utmost importance.

Ignoring how you think and why you act as you do will surely lead (in the long run) to low self-esteem, bitterness, regret and a screaming sense of futility.

Many people who claim to be good at business will tell you that life is full of sharks and that to survive in these turbulent waters you must become predatory as well.  These same folks dismiss their deep feelings as being a handicap to selling or making the big deal.

My challenge to each of you this week is to slow down long enough take an honest look at yourself.  Are you being true to yourself, or are you in the business of trying to impress others with false bravado, slick slogans and designer merchandise?

As Mahatma Gandhi explained:  “My life is my message.”

What is your message to the world?  Discover it, and instantly all pretenses will become unnecessary baggage in your life.


They have left behind many clues which can guide us to becoming the best we can be.

Never again settle for second best.  Your next 24 hours can be as priceless as a Renaissance painting.

Capturing Great Ideas

How many great ideas slip through your consciousness on a daily basis?

Far too many, I bet, and it need not be that way. Capturing great ideas should be a high priority.

capture ideas

Splurge on a journal book. Writing down ideas is a much more effective way to remember things than to type a message/memo into your laptop.

Every day look for people and events that make you say: “There has got to be a better way.”  There is! Write down the problem or irritation and then start looking for solutions or partner with someone who can solve the problem.

You’re in business. Memory is more than an exercise in writing down ideas. It involves taking care of your body and mind so that the aging process doesn’t lead to dementia.

According to the National Institute of Aging, here are a few ways to keep your mind fresher longer:

*Lower cholesterol and high blood pressure. A number of studies in recent years have suggested that vascular diseases–heart disease and stroke–may contribute to the development of dementia.

*Don\’t smoke or abuse alcohol. According to a recent research report from Harvard Medical School, “Improving Memory: Understanding Age-Related Memory Loss,” smokers perform worse than nonsmokers in studies of memory and thinking skills. Heavy alcohol use can also impair memory.

*Get regular exercise. Physical activity may help maintain blood flow to the brain and reduce risk factors associated with dementia.

*Maintain healthy eating habits. Eating vegetables may help slow down the rate of cognitive change in adults. Of the types of vegetables, green leafy vegetables had the strongest association with slowing the rate of cognitive decline. Also reducing foods high in saturated fat and cholesterol and eating fish with beneficial omega-3 fatty acids, such as salmon and tuna, may benefit brain health.

*Maintain social interactions. Social interaction can help reduce stress levels and has been associated with a lower risk of dementia. Get out from that computer parking space once in a while.

*Keep your brain active. Some experts suggest that challenging the brain with such activities as reading, writing, learning a new skill, playing games, and gardening stimulates brain cells and the connections between the cells, and may be associated with a lower risk of dementia.

And…don’t forget what you just read!

The Lincoln Poem

The fundamental fact is,
You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong,
You cannot help small men by tearing down big men,
You cannot help the wage-earner by pulling down the wage-payer,
You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than your income,
You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred,
You cannot establish security on borrowed money,
You cannot build character and courage by taking away a man’s initiative and independence,
You cannot help men permanently, by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

These cannots are both indisputable and worthy of putting on your wall or mirror.  Empowerment is definitely an inside job.

Life in the Balance

2015-06-11_9-38-56From time to time over the years I have heard the same sad song.

Though it is worth a listen, it is often ignored or detested.

The lyrics are sung by a variety of performers, each caught up in the busy-ness of modern life and while striving for financial success and spiritual fulfillment.

Their trouble is that they never live long enough to enjoy the fruits of their labor.  They are casualties of war – the battle between living truthfully and in balance or living in a state of denial which often cuts short their visit to this world.

Your body is an important element of the “good life” which must not and cannot be neglected without dire consequences.

Here are a few of the deadly songs I’ve heard over time and have sung for myself:
1) “I need to lose weight.”  Sung like a dirge, after the fifteenth time of stating the obvious without taking bold action.
2) “I should cut down my drinking.”  Sung in a falsetto, after the third drinking binge in four days leads to a sexual assault charge being filed against you by your secretary, which subsequently results in your being fired.
3) “I know I should see the doctor about that chest pain, but this project is too important to take time off.”  Chanted just three days before a major stroke leaves you incapacitated for your remaining years.
4) “I should quit smoking but…”  Belted out before you start to hack.  By the time your lungs have taken a rest again, you’re lighting up another one and asking:   “Now what was I saying?”   If ever the Grim Reaper were to chortle, now would be his moment.
5) “I know I should exercise, but I don’t enjoy doing it.”  Crooned just before you see a train coming down the track at 100MPH.   The best you can do is to chuck the Budweiser can and hug the bag of chips before crunch  time.

Hey, we have a chance to hear the songs and change the tunes long before the choice is no longer in our hands.  The most important changes for the better in our life start when we get into a doing state of mind.

I speak from experience on this matter, not from the Ivory Tower.

Hate Working Out? Paying a BIG Price for it?

Take an inventory of your health and then begin to change it one cigarette, one beer, one hotdog, one examination, one step at a time.

No matter how old you are or how addicted you may be to an imbalanced life, today can be a new beginning.